Blarg, indeed.

It was a rough day all around. I was scheduled in at open and first off, ten hours later. I pull up in the parking lot thinking about how shitty the day would start out, and see the worst prep cook known to man’s car sitting there. Lovely, my mood has sunken even lower, if that’s possible. He has to have some days off damn it, why isn’t it today!?

He must have some sort of learning deficiency because I just don’t get how he is this dumb and slow, though thinks he’s the world’s best at everything. He’s the kind of guy that always has something to say, no matter what, always has an excuse for everything, gets mad and damn near starts crying when you criticize or joke about him, and is just an all around unlikeable guy. A dildo “know it all” is my only definition. Ignorance is bliss is the other thing that comes to mind; and I wish I had both concurrently. Life would be so much easier.

Anyways, I walk into the restaurant and clock in, put my coat away, and ask a manager to open the office so I can get an apron and a fish-free towel. I solemnly walk back to my co-worker and prepare for the worst. He’s so happy it pisses me off. I was only bummed out, now I’m that plus angry. Blarg.

This douche is behind as much as possible, of course. He spends most of the morning dancing and singing to his iPod or whatever is in his ear. I’m just thinking to myself, “Give me a reason to leave, please.” And then, another bright and shiny-eyed individual makes himself known. It’s the glorious KM! Wow, he’s actually a relief to my burden seeing as that means we have one more body to help ease the pain of another messed up day.

I tell him I’m going to make sure the line is set up and ready to go, as I of course am the one who is going to have to tread through the sludge of what will be Saturday lunch service. He stops me and says, “Nah, I’m taking care of the line and will cook.” WTF? I wanted to say, “Do you remember how?”, but I didn’t. I was actually really relieved. I get to help a border line retarded individual prep food now. And it’s like having a day off to me. My mood increases one hundred fold at that moment.

I start grabbing things left and right, multi-tasking like no tomorrow. Woot! I can hammer all of this crap out in no time on prep. I hear Gary yell out, “You didn’t turn on the fryers!” Mongoloid boy yells back, “Oh, sorry. I’ve been in such a rush today.” Then this dick wants to reminisce with me about the time he forgot to turn on the fryers when I was cooking. Yeah, it’s still not funny idiot. Orders backed up for twenty minutes before I could even start them. Wow, great past time story you fucking simpleton!

And then it happens. Yup, something always happens. Not more than five minutes after we start serving customers, Gary calls me up to help him on line. What ensued was just disgusting for how wonderful a service it could have been. The kitchen manager, his star prep cook, and me. Two people failed magnificently in this scenario, and I guarantee you, it wasn’t me.

  

Oh my God, I don’t even want to type this all out tonight anymore, and this was the first hour of ten in a never ending service. I’ll just leave it here so I have to edit it tomorrow or the next day. I just want to go to sleep. Apologies all around, until editing time, in the life of a line cook.